Loss, Just Loss


Remember back in December when I wrote about loss anticipated vs. loss experienced? Well, the loss I was anticipating back then has been experienced: my mom died.

Her death was slow, ugly and cruel, in ways that offered both profound suffering and some really remarkable blessings for all of us. Because it was so slow, we had time to prepare, and to say and do what we needed to. Because it was so ugly, we were able to let her go--we didn't want her to stick around for more of what she was enduring. Because it was so cruel, we got to learn something about compassion and work hard to comfort her and each other.

The funeral was really nice, and very well attended--I saw so many old friends. We buried her near her parents in the truly beautiful Binghampton Cemetery in Tucson, two days before Easter. Some of my siblings were lamenting the fact that the proximity to Easter would taint the holiday henceforth, but I, the godless heathen, said, "What are you talking about? She's being buried on Good Friday. Can you think of a better, more meaningful day for her to be buried on?" And that did seem to offer comfort to people.

I really miss her.



Oh, Holly, I'm so sorry. May you have peace and comfort, even though I'm sure you'll always miss her.

What you told your family brought me to tears ... and I'm pretty heathen-ish, too.

Hugs to you.

Sweetheart, you are so much stronger than you even know. The grace in which you face your life is a strength and example to me.

I'm so sorry. I wish I had something better to say.

I too am sorry to hear of your loss. It is horrible to see people you love in pain.

For me personally, I find comfort in knowing when a person is no longer in pain and at peace.

thanks, everyone.

Holly, stopping by this blog for the first time in a long time (busy spring), I just had to say how terribly sorry I am to hear this. I know good and well that there's really nothing to say in this situation that can help. But for what they're worth you have my sympathies and thoughts and condolences.

Hi Stephen--thanks for your note. The loss still hurts, so it's gratifying to know that people still care, even after it's been a while.

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This page contains a single entry by Holly published on April 12, 2010 6:36 AM.

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