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February 14, 2006

Happy Valentine's Day

My three favorite dates are December 16 (my birthday), December 25 (although I'm one of those evil pagans who prefers wishing friends and strangers "Happy Holidays" to "Merry Christmas," I still dig the whole giving-and-getting-gifts part of the gig), and February 14.

I like February 14 for two reasons: One, it's Arizona Statehood Day. That's right, Arizona became the 48th state in the Union on February 14, 1912. Because it was so fashionably late to the AWESOME party thrown by the Federal Government, I am able to say that none of my grandparents were born in the United States: three were born in Arizona before it became a state; the fourth, like a good many Mormons, was born in Mexico (which is where the polygamists went to stay polygamists, until Pancho Villa came along and told them to get the hell out).

Of course, the other reason I like February 14 is that it's Valentine's Day.

This is the 43rd Valentine's Day I've spent on this planet. For, oh, 39 of those 43, I've not had a Valentine to call my own (I even had two long-term relationships where I managed to be on the outs with my sig/ot during the month of February), but the fact that any flowers I received on such days were from my mother (she never neglects me or my sisters on Valentine's Day: she sent bouquets to all four of us on Monday) and any chocolate I got, I bought myself, hasn't dampened my enthusiasm for the day.

I just like it, you know? I like construction paper and scissors and glue. I like doilies. I like crayons and markers. I like red a lot, and pink is OK. I like chocolate. I like flowers. I like hearts. I like sending big envelopes through the US mail and I like telling the people I love that I love them, even if they don't offer to take me to dinner, call me sweetheart and kiss me passionately on the 14th day of February. (I'm not saying I'm opposed to the idea, I'm just saying it doesn't have to happen. I accept other gestures of affection and regard. One of my all-time favorite Valentine's Day presents is a garlic press my sister bought me in 1990 when we shared an apartment--I use it still.)

There have been years when I've made fudge for the dozen or so people closest to me. There have been years when I've baked heart-shaped cakes. There have been years when I've sent dozens of Valentines, to pretty much everyone in my address book. I'd rather do that than send Christmas cards--I mean, it's just so commonplace to send red envelopes in December to people you ignore the rest of the year, but who does it in February?

If I'd had my shit together this year, I would have fashioned a huge, elaborate heart of pink and red paper, a sincere token of my affection for all my friends and readers. I would have taken a photo of said creation, and uploaded it here. Unfortunately, however, that did not happen.

So you'll just have to accept this blog entry as my Valentine to you. If I know you well enough to love you, then believe me, I love you! And if we're still in the early stages of our friendship, then I like you every bit as much as I can without seeming pathetic, threatening and weird.

And if you like or love me too, please leave a comment and tell me so.

Posted by holly at February 14, 2006 12:16 AM

12 Comments

By spike on February 14, 2006 7:09 AM

Well, Happy Valentine's Day! I am quite tickled to wish you a day full of joy and love. I totally agree with you about Valentine's day (though, honestly, Arizona Day does not ring quite the same bells for me). I am just this moment indulging in a Marcel Proust moment, recalling the smells of paste, crayons and construction paper. Thank you for bringing that back to me. And I hope you will get a long list of e-smooches in your comments from your faithful readers today!!!

By Chris Bigelow on February 14, 2006 10:55 AM

Happy Valentine's to you too. Ours is almost completely an online friendship, but you are probably the most interesting former Mormon I know!

By Major Steel on February 14, 2006 11:45 AM

Happy V-Day, Holly. I do hope you get flowers and chocolate and paste-drenched paper hearts for today and for your next 43 Valentine's Days to come!

By Juti on February 14, 2006 1:13 PM

Thank you! As we used to say in elementary school, "same to you but more of it!"

My husband just came to my office and apologized for not remembering Valentine's day. I gave him a smooch and said, "no, sweetheart, it's Arizona Statehood Day, you didn't forget anything." We are two expat Zonies and miss it very much. I can still hear the wind in the Flagstaff pines if it's quiet, even here in my office in Wyoming.

My favorite holidays are the ones that include days off, food, and friends/family.

By Reese Witherfork on February 14, 2006 1:34 PM

Happy VD (Valentines Day) Holly,

I just shipped my daughter off to playschool with her little purse stuffed with Cinderella Valentine cards for all her friends/arch-rivals.

She's almost four and, the other day, I asked her which boys she liked at school (of course I meant "which boys do you like AS FRIENDS" and she said "do you mean, to marry???"

Needless to say, I damn near chocked on my espresso.

Have a super-duper day!!!

By frankengirl on February 14, 2006 1:37 PM

I'm definitely a V-Day Humbug, but it's good to know the spirit of joy is out there. Perhaps it was just one too many red roses from quite the wrong suitors that make me squeamish of V-Day. Boys with secret crushes on me in school always got the nerve to come out of the woodwork on this day. I was so shy and just couldn’t muster enough gratitude for those little pink bears and plastic hearts.

Enjoy your day :)

By Jana on February 14, 2006 4:54 PM

Holly, I wish you all the best of this holiday season (paste and construction paper hearts included). I like the sentiment behind V-Day, but I dislike the commercialism. I'd prefer flowers on another day of the year, personally, because it would mean more than a socially expected gesture.

Having said that, I'm enjoying my little V-day gift from John, and I can't wait to see what fun cards/treats my kids will be bringing home from school!! :)

By John on February 14, 2006 5:53 PM

Happy Valentine's Day! After Jana and the kiddos, you were the next person that came to mind to definitely wish a happy VD to!

I hope you follow through on your heart project at some point. Green (in all of its shades) is my favorite color, but an occasional splash of red is nice. It would be reminiscent of holly...

By Holly on February 14, 2006 7:44 PM

I'm like you, Juti, in that I like time off to eat and relax with friends and family. That's one reason I like Thanksgiving: that's all you do. You don't have to decorate or invent some kind of fun.

Too many red roses, Frankengirl! Well, I suppose that could be terrible. Maybe the fact that I never got a single such rose is why I still like the day. :-)

By tammy on February 15, 2006 12:50 AM

I started the day without any sense of single-person anti-VD bitterness, but then these women at work kept getting flowers delivered to them and I, as the lobby-area receptionist type person, got to deliver the bouquets to their offices. I repeatedly held my breath the moment when I first saw the delivery man come through the front door all hidden by a beautiful bouquet and I would briefly, irrationally hope they were for me, but then the delivery man would again and again say someone else's name and I would let my breath go and say thank you and bring the flowers to an surprised and elated woman with a 75% fake smile on my face (25% of me is just a sucker for romantic gestures). That happened 6 times today. There are, including me, 7 women that work there.

I did realize, however, that not getting flowers because I’m single is way better then not getting them because my boyfriend is a shithead.

Despite today’s suckiness, I would still like to wish you a Happy Valentine’s Day. The way you celebrate it is very inspiring.

By Matt on February 15, 2006 2:31 AM

Happy Valentine's Day, Holly. It's great to have a day of the year when one can be involved in a little magic - and it is magic when you send someone a love token anonymously. My most favourite Valentines have been the ones that I still don't know the origin of - and that's a pretty hard thing to do... I do want to ask, however, what are your feelings on the fact that SAINT Valentine was a Christian? Where I live we have a large non-Christian population and it was clear they were not celebrating St Valentine's Day... Perhaps one of your readers knows of a smilar celebration in the pagan world? Or perhaps there are already pagan connections to Valentine's Day (as there are for Christmas)?

By Holly on February 15, 2006 9:10 AM

Matt--I got out my little hagiography to read up on Saint Valentine, and discovered that

The association of [Feb 14] with courtship may arise from the mid-February pagan fertility feast of Lupercalia, and/or from the medieval believe that birds chose their mates on this day. "Valentines" were originally cards boys drew by lots, inscribed with the names of the girls to be courted. An attempt to improve this custom by substituting the names of the Saints to be emulated was once made, without much success, by Saint Francis de Sales.

So, I don't see that Saint Valentine--or his religion--really has much to do with the day. And it just goes to show, that as with Christmas and Easter, it's the pagans, not the Christians, who are responsible for FUN aspect of a holiday--the revelry and happiness bit.

Go pagans! (Wouldn't it be kind of cool to have "the pagans" as a team name?)

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